I don't think I've spent this much time looking out windows since, well, I don't know when. We had crazy weather today in the northeast. Winds buffeted us left and right, wisteria vines whipped the screens. I enjoy extreme weather like this, so I didn't mind it for myself, but the boys and the dog got a bit stir-crazy, I think.
Adding to the drama, we celebrated Lire's third birthday today! It was an arduous day for Habtam, unfortunately. From the moment L got to choose breakfast, to the blowing out of the candles, to the opening of the presents, he suffered a lot of frustration. Up until now the boys have received equally, and no amount of preparation or discussion seemed to prepare H for L's birthday. We kept it incredibly low-key, with only Al's three cousins joining us, no balloons, no decorations of any kind, and a tiny cake. We even ended up putting away the presents we got for L, and the one his grandparents got him, because the two L received from the cousins were too painful for H. The cousins even got H a gift, so he wouldn't feel left out, but it didn't do the trick. We're going to put the b'day presents away for Christmas, and have L open his grandparents' gift tomorrow morning.
The good news is that H was able to talk about why he was sad and why he decided it would be a good idea to throw weighty, jagged toys down the stairs. I'm not joking, as horridly as H behaved today, the fact that he could come to me for a hug, articulate what he was feeling, and get through the day without a real meltdown (ie., screaming for an hour, hours more of silent treatment), and in a relatively stable mood, well, I was grateful. It is very, very difficult for him to see anyone receive something when he doesn't, not to mention watching as people celebrated his brother, through singing and gifts. It was "too 'ard," as he would say.
But not to steal the show from L! Here is a message to my baby boy (I know, he's 3! But he likes to pretend that he's my baby):
My sweet, sweet boy, I am so glad I got to celebrate you and all that you are today. Not that we don't quietly celebrate you every day, because we do. Your love for life is infectious and inspiring, and I hope that you always find joy as easily as you do now. Yesterday we went to the dump, and you would have thought I had taken you to Disney World! Though I clearly remember my own excitement at my dad's and my weekly forays to the local dump, so I get it, I really do.
I thought a lot about your parents today, and we talked about them. About how your mother gave you wutit*, and how she carried you on her back. You love to talk about these things about your first mother, and I can tell you love her for taking care of you when you were a baby.
This morning you woke up and asked, "Yiye's Happy Bird-day?" Yes, it's your Happy Bird-day, and may you have many, many more to celebrate and enjoy. Thank you so very much for your generous heart and plentiful soonki**, and thank you for sharing your new toys with your brother. You are wise beyond your years, my little bodhisattva. We love you dearly.